★第一部：サポートもないままひとりで探し求めた真実
Part 1: Seeking truth without support

ミエ・コヒヤマさん（以下、M）:　訴訟を起こすのは大変な決断でしたよね？
Mie Kohiyama(M) : Was it difficult to decide whether or not to approach the police to file a complaint after you were raped?

詩織さん（以下、S）:　はい、とても難しかったです。当初は自分の身に起こったことにあまりにも混乱していたし、TBSのワシントン支局長だった山口氏を尊敬していたこともあり、ました。何がなんだかわからなくて、とにかく自分のアパートに帰って体を洗いたかった。実はこれが、証拠を消してしまう最もやってはいけないことだったのですが。とにかく、私はどうすればいいのか？ 誰かに教えて欲しかった。
  日本の学校では、いかに身を守るかは教えるけれど、対処法は教えてくれません。レイプされたら、被害を受けたら自分に落ち度があったのではないか。そんな考え方がどこか私にもにあって、自分自身で冷静に事実を認識するまで時間がかかったと思います。
 
Shiori Ito (S) : It was a very hard decision to take. I was so confused about what had happened to me and I also had a lot of respect for Mr. Yamaguchi, who was the bureau chief for TBS in Washington at the time.
 It was very hard to understand what had just happened, but all I knew was that I had to go home and take a shower. This was, in fact, the worst thing I could have done because you lose all of the evidence you need, although I had evidence on my underwear…  I wish someone had told me what to do when these things happen.
 In school, they don’t teach you what to do after you face such circumstances. They simply tell you how to protect yourself, how to prevent yourself from ending up in such situations. So if you are raped or sexually assaulted, it’s very easy to blame yourself, to tell yourself that you weren’t able to avoid the situation, or couldn’t protect yourself. This is why it took me some time to fully realize what had happened – because I blamed myself.

M:　あなたも多くの被害者と同じように「自分が悪い」と感じたわけね。その後なぜ、届け出たの？
M: It seems that you reacted like many other rape victims do: they feel guilty and place the blame on themselves. How, then, did you get to the point where you contacted the police to file a complaint?

S:　日に日に体の痛みが増していったからです。アフターピルを飲みましたが妊娠の恐怖が頭を離れなかったし、膝の関節がずれベッドから起き上がるのも辛かった。
　今までインターンなどで働いた経験で、日本のメディアがいかに男性社会かはわかっていたし、相手は総理、有力政治家とも太いパイプをもつ人。私の言うことなんか、だれも信じないだろうと思いました。ちょうど勉強も終わり、ずっと憧れていた夢の仕事につく直前でしたが大学を卒業して就職活動中だったし、この業界、社会は「こんなものなのか……」と。
　でも、事実に蓋をしたら私の何かが捻じれてしまう、と気づいたんです。ジャーナリストとして真実を追うのに、自分の真実からは目を背けるのか？　このとき、事件を公にしよう、警察に届けようと思ったんです。
 
S: I decided to take action because, in the days after the incident, my body started to hurt more and more. My kneecap was dislocated. It was hard to get out from bed, both physically and mentally. I was also constantly haunted by my fear of an unwanted pregnancy, even though I had taken the morning-after pill.
 I had already known how much of a male-dominated society the Japanese media industry is, having worked in various companies as an intern in the past. I had known that my aggressor was connected to powerful politicians, including the Prime Minister, and I didn’t think anyone would believe me.
 I was about to finish my studies and graduate from university, working towards my dream of becoming a journalist, when it happened. At the time, I was looking for a job in media, and I thought this was the norm, that this was what happened regularly in this industry, in our society. 
 Having grown up in Japan, this experience made me think that maybe this is the way that this society works; we just have to bear the violence.
 But I knew I was going to feel twisted inside if I tried to put a lid on the truth. I also realized that if I couldn’t face my truth, I would have no right to be a journalist. Taking away my dream meant that I had no reason to live. This is how I decided that I would have to talk about what had happened, and this was the moment I decided to go to the police.